The Astronomical Society
of New South Wales Incorporated
Since 1954 | ABN 51 807 120 936 | www.asnsw.com

New Telescope And Theme Park For Mt Stromlo

Unsuccessful negotiations for the purchase of the Ilford Roadhouse have resulted in plans for the re-location of Mt Stromlo Observatory to Ilford being put on hold.

Meanwhile, some limited instrumentation will be placed on Stromlo for teaching purposes, along with a theme park to generate revenue as the Insurance payout following the January, 2003 fires was less than expected and the Federal Government fully as stingy as expected.

The New 2m ƒ/4 “Politician’s Telescope” for Mt Stromlo The telescope is to be named the “Politician's Telescope” as it is cheap but promises much. Designed by Hawkesbury genius Richmond Windsor, the primary mirror, two metres in diameter, will be made from ten sheets of 10mm plate-glass laminated together with super glue.

To save costs of grinding and polishing, the blank will be slumped into a mould cheaply made by rotating a vat of cement at a speed suitable to produce a parabola of ƒ/4 focal length, after which the cement mould will serve both as the mirror cell and to support the back of the mirror.

A simple Commodore-64 computer-controlled alt-azimuth mount, using a turntable modified from a surplus caravan park sized Hills Hoist, will be constructed along with a roll-off pre-fabricated steel garage to serve as housing.

Fitted with Argo Navis and Dick Smith's highest grade web cam, the telescope will be the most innovative instrument yet constructed in Australia. This telescope will be used to instruct students from the Australian National University in the usual basics - space is big, the planets are round so the Earth must also be etc…

The adjacent theme park will cover a wide range of scientific disciplines so that the public can watch science at work.

Aspects of psychology will be addressed by operation SILAP - Search for Intelligent Life Amongst Political animals.

Budding Australian National University student politicians will be placed in a "Survivor" environment, with attractive groupies of all genders, strategically hidden wads of cash in plain brown envelopes stashed in locations found after interpreting subtle clues, and unlimited free booze.

The physics of hot air ballooning will be covered, with free rides to park attendees, costs being kept down by piping the hot air from the debating chamber of Federal Parliament.

Mathematics is to be explored by constructing a state-of-the-art gambling casino, with equal numbers of loaded and unloaded dice, fixed and unfixed roulette wheels, marked and unmarked cards and of course superbly programmable poker machines.

This will not only test the skills of visitors in mathematically figuring out which games are crooked, but also earn revenue along the way.