Sophisticated radar measurements of Jupiter conducted with a 12,000 Ångstrom fusion flux radar installation at the Bogong High Plains in Victoria's High Country have revealed hitherto unsuspected findings about our neighbouring giant planet.
The research is being carried out as a co-operative venture between the Oodnadatta Campus of the University of Adelaide, Honours science students at Sofala High School, and the Bogong Lovers Society of Australia, the latter group having donated a portion of their acreage atop the high plains to host the 98 metre interferometric dual radar dishes.
The grand opening of the installation last June was performed by the Prime Minister who cracked a bottle of Star Port over each dish and was pleased to be able to say that he was alert but not alarmed. Distinguished guests had included Emmanuel Snodgrass, Dipso Maniak, Ivor Merino and the late Albert Einstein (in absentia).
Initial findings suggest that not only does Jupiter have a solid core of metallic hydrogen approximately 41,870km in diameter but that it also features an elevation, or mountain some 3,400km high corresponding with the latitude and longitude of the Great Red Spot.
It seems that the moon reported in Alternate Universe Volume #7 as having been discovered orbiting within the atmosphere of Jupiter directly beneath the Great Red Spot has quietly settled on the surface of the inner core without the forecast fireworks, gravitational effects, electrical arcing or massive explosions. But curiously, forms a high, but narrow mountain which defies explanation.
The clear inference is that the nonsense talked of for centuries about the Great Red Spot being a long lasting storm, or cyclone is nothing more than nonsense. The “Spot” is nothing more than turbulence and updrafts around the summit of this natural feature - a good example of why superstitions like this, the big bang, the red shift and recession, and little green men on Mars should be the subject of constant doubt and rigorous testing.
When fitted with digital Hydrogen-alpha filters, it is proposed to turn the radar dishes on to several comets as they approach perihelion to ascertain if comets are uniform in composition containing, for example, only frozen gases, or contain rocky or metallic cores.
In order to allay the fears of animal liberationists and the Greens, radar emissions are scheduled well outside the annual Bogong Moth migration period.